My relationship with ‘content’ is a very long and winding one; revolving mainly around writing or editing words over the past 20 years.

But at the very start of it all, I had no aspiration to be ‘someone who blogs’ or otherwise broadcasts their thoughts online.

I just did some marketing. Then, I went home, and I didn’t write about anything.

Then as the years went on, I turned my hand to everything across digital marketing — from strategy to tactical stuff. Then, I went home, and I still didn’t write about anything.

And that was fine.

Wind on to early 2016, and, without any prior planning or strategy, I tried to build my own website (first published under the ‘Digital Drum’ moniker).

Building the first (scrappy) iteration in under a day, I added both a ‘Blog’ and a ‘Freelancing’ section to the nav, and there we were — I was suddenly a blogger faced with a totally blank web section. Starting gun… fired?

I did a bit of writing on and off for the site, and slowly, slowly… it expanded into hosting some guest articles too.

In the 8+ years since, the site’s gathered a bit of momentum, but working two jobs (up until this year), life, having a kid… of course means there’s no regular time I can legitimately carve out for non-work writing. And at times I’ve found myself feeling distinctively inadequate — even envious — when I see how relentlessly productive and disciplined-as-hell other writers can be (are one of them?).

This goes back way before the days of content-related AI capabilities entering the mainstream too. I mean, how on earth does someone keep this level of output up? It can make you feel like you’re not good enough, and I have felt very critical of myself countless times over the years.

• I reflect on all the literature, classic and modern, that I should have read by now — books that might have made me a ‘better writer’, if the theories are to be believed.

• I see books specifically about becoming a better writer and think “I should definitely read that” — but beyond buying the book and having it land on my doormat just a couple of days later… I KNOW it will just sit on my bedside table for weeks.

• I see articles about improving your writing* — of which there are probably thousands by now — and I can’t possibly read them all, even focusing on one is quite hard to find the motivation for…

*there are plenty of them written by guest authors on this very site, and I do read them — obviously.

Perhaps you’re reading this and totally get what I’m talking about — because this is you, too? In fact, it’s only very recently that I’ve come to realise that scolding myself for not regularly immersing myself in all these great resources whilst also producing content at a rate of knots doesn’t do me any good.

When I choose to write should be totally down to me. I just can’t make myself write every day. It doesn’t work like that for me. It wouldn’t feel sincere. I wouldn’t be pleased with any of it.

I have to write when I’m ready.

So now, I’m working on giving myself a break for not being as prolific as others; accepting too, that I probably never will be. I’m trying to shift my thinking away from all the self-criticism and towards allowing myself the freedom to concentrate on just writing good things…

…when I’m ready to write them.

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